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Thread: Need help taming a love bird

  1. #1

    Default Need help taming a love bird

    I originally posted this on another board and got but a single response. I'm going to try here for some help.


    I have an MSL that I was taming using the conventional method. I had got him up to the point where he would eat out of my hand, step up about 50% of the time, would come back to me to get to his cage after running around, (he is clipped) and reacted well when I had my hands in his cage to do food/water changes.

    One day, he just reverted, and every day has got worse. Now he is afraid of me, and runs. He won't step up, won't come near me, even if I try to bribe him with treats. I didn't do anything wrong, but now he is a source of endless frustration.

    I'm doing a method opposite of conventional, since he no longer responds to it. Putting my hand in the cage with a treat in it just makes him scared. Getting him to step up on a perch is impossible.

    Right now I'm just handling him as much as possible. He shakes at first, but I give him some skritches and he calms down and gets sleepy. He has never bitten me. Unfortunately, this involves scooping him up, but when he runs out of his cage in terror of me changing his food, I can't get him back any other way but following him for a bit and grabbing him.

    I'm also having a feeding problem.

    the bird will not eat it's food. right now I'm feeding it a super nutritious mix:

    herbs
    egg food
    egg shells
    volkman's mix
    harrison pellets
    organic dried fruits and veggies

    it's all minced up to bite size and mixed. He picks out what little he wants (eats less than 20% of the total serving), then uses his beak to shovel the rest out of the cage on onto the table and floor. This angers me to no end, it's a pain to clean it all up. He then starves himself, and only drinks water until I give him a nutri berry which he eats about 65% of it. Right now he won't even let me handfeed him, so he isn't even getting the berries.

    So by the afternoon he has poop that is pretty much all water because he has no solids in his system. I ended up buying a $3 bag of 4lbs of (crappy) seed and he seems to love it more than this super expensive all organic fancy feast mix which costs more than I spend on my own food.

    If anyone has any feedback or suggestions, please let me know.
    Last edited by michael; 11-21-2009 at 11:15 AM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Florida, USA
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    Sorry for the delay in responding to your message!

    How old is your lovebird? Age isn't a big factor in the trust relationship but sometimes birds go through phases and I'm asking to see if perhaps what's happening is just temporary.

    Let me address diet. In the wild, lovebirds are seed eaters. Many of us feed a varied diet with a quality seed mix as the base. This is what I do. I add about 20% pellets and the rest is fresh food. FYI, Nutriberries are an excellent food source and can be fed as more than just a treat. Have you tried offering sprouted seed? It's very nutritious and most birds adore sprouts!

    Sounds like you need to go back to square one with your lovebird. It takes time to build a trust relationship and many of the members here can tell you just how frustrating it can be but it's well worth it once you make that breakthrough!

    I would start by going back and just sitting by the cage and talking to him. Let him come to you rather than you go to him. You want him to accept you as part of HIS flock rather than the other way around. Have you changed anything about your person that might be scaring him? Clothing in the color red can be frightening to parrots. Some react while others don't. Red nail polish can have the same effect. If you sit near his cage in a non-threatening manner, he will eventually decide to check you out again. Lovebirds are naturally curious so you will win this part of the battle at some point. Try eating near his cage. Birds are social eaters. They tend to want to eat when they see you eating.

    Once you catch his interest again, open the cage door and let him come to you. Humans are fascinating places to play and explore! Such fun and so many places to hide.........

    Hope this helps. Others should also have more input for you. BTW, welcome to Lovebirds Plus Community!
    Linda L.
    There are no bad birds, just misunderstood ones.



  3. #3
    Join Date
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    Western Australia
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    Welcome and Hi.

    I completely agree with Linda and taking it back to the beginning. I found that force handling makes a bird more weary of you, as there is no trust because they believe you will violate it by handling them when they don't want to be. Sometimes rare cases occur where this does work but for my two fids, taking it back to square one has been the best route for all of us.

    Re: the diet issue. i was talking to my avian vet about diet due to nesting issues I had with my Elmo. He very quietly told me that in reality lovebirds can do alright on seed. Although this is not what you want to do. A varied diet is always the best for nutrition and minerals... but dont be too alarmed if they are just eating plain seed. As Linda mentioned, they are seed eaters after all My Elmo for the first 10 months of her life just ate seed, but slowly over time with alot of patience I began to introduce more variety to their diet. Now she loves all of the different foods on offer, but a year ago she'd turn her beak up to them.

    This may be just an Elmo thing, not sure if other peoples fids do this too. But I find when I mix all of her food up together, she will just pick out the seeds. Compared too if, if i have a veggie station, a pellet station, a seed station and an egg and biscuit station. I find she eats all of them. Maybe it's her version of foraging.

    I also wonder whether your fid recognizes the rest of as food? From personal experience, it took a long time before Elmo realized what sultanas were, let alone veggies. She's only JUST (literally a week ago!) started to eat fresh vegetables because she has seen Spotty eat them. The same goes with pellets. It was by chance that she accidentally bit down on one to realise.. mm this is yummy!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    I also wonder whether your fid recognizes the rest of as food? From personal experience, it took a long time before Elmo realized what sultanas were, let alone veggies. She's only JUST (literally a week ago!) started to eat fresh vegetables because she has seen Spotty eat them. The same goes with pellets. It was by chance that she accidentally bit down on one to realise.. mm this is yummy!
    I have to agree with this completely! If your lovie was not weaned onto anything else but seed, that's all that's recognized as food. Birds will starve even with lots of food in their cages simply because they don't recognize different foods as edible. I offer my babies all sorts of food, as babies are naturally curious. It's not as hard to get them to take that first taste. Adults can be much harder!
    Linda L.
    There are no bad birds, just misunderstood ones.



  5. #5
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    Welcome to the board. I have been around the board for years and know this is the best place for you to be to get through this tough time with your lovie .

    My first suggestion is for you to stand back and take a breath. You sound like you are upset and frustrated at your lovie for it not doing what you want when you want. Many of us have been in your position, but those of us who have been able to accept birds on their terms have had some great long term success. In fact, my first lovie Zimber was a crazy wild lovebird who I wanted to bond with so badly that I scared him away. It wasn't until I decided I would never try and touch him (and I didn't for years) or put my hand in his cage that our relationship took off. And, after eight years, Zimber would perch on my finger and let me kiss his belly and rub his back. He hated it, but learned to trust me after years and years and years.

    I agree that going back to the beginning is the best option at this point. I really suggest you look at some of the older posts in the taming section as there is great information. I always suggest searching for Tango's Mom cause she has some great threads about taming her lovie. I've included two. The key info to the posts is patience and understanding. I would also search to see if some of my older posts give more of my experiences with Zimber, which might be helpful. Finally, as you redevelop your relationship with your lovie, consider stick training instead of finger training. I use a dowel for stepping up, and it takes away the hand issue but allows you to move and interact with your lovie without them worrying about getting touched.

    http://www.lovebirdsplus.com/communi...ead.php?t=4416

    http://www.lovebirdsplus.com/communi...ead.php?t=4776

    Please don't be too discouraged. You have years with your lovie and your love and patience will be rewarded in ways you never thought imaginable with your frightened little guy.
    Last edited by LauraO; 11-21-2009 at 08:28 AM.
    Laura O

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    This angers me to no end, it's a pain to clean it all up.

    I think the first thing you need to do is exactly what LauraO said....stand back and take a breath and try not to let this make you angry. Birds are very good at sensing our feelings and trust me, this lovie knows if you're upset with him! It could even be the reason why he has changed. Your lovie is scared for a reason!! and that reason is NOT to annoy you and make you mad! Birds are not domesticated creatures like dogs and cats, and will tend to have behaviors that are like wild bird.....this takes time for birds to accept us and our homes as theirs and us as part of their flock.
    I have a lovebird Rudy that I got back in July.....he's still terrified of us! but I love watching him just be a lovie.....taking a bath, playing with his toys, letting him to fly around a bit. If I talk to him and try to get up close, he watches me intently.....like he's listening! You really should try to take the time to see who your lovie is.....his personality and the GOOD things about him! Lovebirds also tend to be a bit mischeivous....do you know HOW many spilled food dishes I've had to clean up after??? Pip used to go around the tiels cage on the outside and knock their food dishes off the side of their cage! I had to go out and buy expensive food dishes that stay locked onto the cage just because of him! but he's a lovie.....and lovies love to have fun, and this was just fun for him.....he's only a bird, he doesn't know that this was annoying for me!
    Please don't be in such a big rush to make your bird behave the way you want.....for one you won't win that battle, and it shouldn't be a battle. Birds require alot of patience and love. ALSO.....I have found that scared birds will tend to not eat the foods we want them to......once they become more comfortable in their homes and with the people in their lives, they tend to try new foods more easily. I don't worry with Rudy right now about his diet so much.....I mix pellets in with his seed and I have actually sat and watched Rudy eat and watched him eat one of the pellets from the seed/pellet mix, so he is eating some of them! I don't think eating seed is such a bad thing with lovies because they have a huge energy level....it isn't like they are going to get fat! It's not the end of the world here....it's just your lovie learing to accept you and new foods.....take your time, relax and enjoy your lovie. He WILL come around in his own time on his own terms!
    I hope that someday people can understand that it's not "just a bird,"
    but the very thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being "just a
    human."

  7. #7
    Join Date
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    Welcome.

    If he is not at the "teenage" years of rebellion and independence, i.e., a phase that will pass, then I agree with the others who have posted already.

    I would add: Try not to get angry and frustrated because it changes your energy level and your lovie will sense the change, will look at your fixed staring eyes, and will conclude that here is a predator out to eat me. Your lovie will react with terror.

    Serenity from within you is important when dealing with companion parrots (or any animal or person) because they would prefer to work with a pleasant person than an ogre. I would!

    Patience is an ever-flowing font and if you will learn how to be patient when working with your lovie, you will have a happier lovie. You will not be a lesser person for having learned it. Of course, we don't ever hit our lovies. Perish the thought!

    BTW, parrots are naturally messy. My two wipe their beaks on me, scatter seeds and husks everywhere, and generally express their exuberance.

    A relationship with lovies has many levels, from the casual to the deep. It took me about three years before my Juanita was tame enough. This was a slow journey but a deeply satisfying one because I now have a delightful lovie. I enjoy hanging out with her and Petey.

    Petey

  8. #8

    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    Thanks for all of the responses.

    Here is an update:

    He is 3 months old. I got him from a breeder, he was not handfed, but was the only bird in his group that didn't bite and seemed calm.

    So far he still won't take any treats from me, so positive reinforcement is impossible. He won't step up on a dowel, not on a hand, pretty much nothing.

    At the time of the original post on the 18th, he was still tolerant of my hand being in the cage, as of today he now flies out of the cage in sheer terror. When I scoop him up as gently as I can, he shakes like crazy until I calm him down on my lap with some skritches. After that, he will stay put for a while and relax, until I make any kind of movement, which in that case he runs in terror.

    He will not come out of his cage. I have left the door open to his cage and even tried leaving the room, but he will not leave the cage. I have a play gym that I keep him on when I clean his cage, but he pretty much just looks high and low for a way to run for his life.

    He still has eating issues, but if he wants to eat the junk seed and it's ok, fine. I'll keep putting it in there, I'll save a ton of money in the end anyway.

    I'm going to retool my game plan since things continue to go downhill. Every day is getting worse. I guess the first step is to just have the cage around me all the time so he gets used to me being around.

    Personally I think it's easier to just replace this bird with a hand fed conure.

    Just kidding! hahaha. I'll keep you guys updated, and thanks again.

  9. #9
    Join Date
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    I guess the first step is to just have the cage around me all the time so he gets used to me being around.
    Yes. Back to square one and start over again. It may take some time but he needs to experience for himself that you mean him no harm. You've been forcing the issue and it's not working, nor will it work. He needs to be able to accept you as a member of HIS flock, not you accept him as a member of yours.
    Linda L.
    There are no bad birds, just misunderstood ones.



  10. #10
    Join Date
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    Default Re: Need help taming a love bird

    Wow....geez, I didn't realize it was THAT bad! With Rudy I have gotten him to eat millet while I was holding onto it and he doesn't seem to mind at all when I do things in his cage. He also comes out of his cage most of the time on his own and will step up onto a perch for me most of the time.
    Right now with your lovie, I really wouldn't worry about giving him seed ir his diet....I'd worry more that he's eating enough! Once he warms up, you can worry about his diet....he's still very young so you have lots of time for diet change later on. One trick I've learned is that lovies usually go crazy for other lovies and if you don't have another one at home, you can go to youtube and find some lovie videos to play. Your lovie may hear them and think there's another lovie and it might help lure him out of his cage! Is your lovie clipped??? because a good clip will calm him down alot and help with taming. It will also make it easier when you want to get him back into the cage. With Rudy, I can get him to go back to his cage easily and once he lands on top, he tends to go back in by himself, so I have an easy time with him now and can let him out quite a bit without having to worry about getting him back in. Before the wing clip though forget it! He was all over the place!
    I feel bad for what you're going through and for this lovie for being so terrified. Just remember one thing through all of this......one day you may look back on this day and be very happy with your choice to just love him and be patient....it will pay off in the end! Best of luck to you!
    I hope that someday people can understand that it's not "just a bird,"
    but the very thing that gives me humanity and keeps me from being "just a
    human."

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